ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
