god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
