Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize