I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Randomize
