So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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