Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
