I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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