come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize