She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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