i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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