dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Randomize
