idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize