Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
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