im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
