Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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