This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
