I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
