His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
