It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize