He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
