great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
