none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
