Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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