How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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