Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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