So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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