Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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