idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Randomize
