I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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