That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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