i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize