So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
