I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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