Duck Duck Cougar?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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