Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
