me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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