So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
