I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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