He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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