You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize