Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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