my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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