Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
