Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
