just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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