i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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