rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
