We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
