somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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