How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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