he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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